Napoleon Hill

“Our only limitations are those we set up in our own minds”

Napoleon Hill

I have a friend from a TBI support group call me today saying that he doesn’t like how ‘people like us’ are treated in specific relationships….whoa! What do you mean people like us? “You know, people with our limitations…” Limitations?  I have no limitations…  “Well, you don’t drive”  A lot of people don’t drive.  Personally, I don’t drive by choice.

I went to COLLEGE, Longwood College, and I am so proud of that.  Was it hard?  Yes, it was super hard, learning to live by myself, right ouwp-1457972851409.jpgt of high school, balancing friends and classes and (FINALLY!) having the freedom, the freedom to choose.  To choose when to do classwork, when to have dinner, whether or not to go to this social event and WHEN TO GO TO SLEEP.  If I wanted, I could stay up until 4 AM on a Wednesday morning, studying for a midterm or working on a paper, all because the night before was a busy social night.

My anxiety kept right on, even after my freshman year and I was supposed to be ‘used to it,’ there were always tests to study for, papers to write and a room to keep clean.  My parents can attest to my anxiety by the amount of late night phone calls that they received.  Although I enjoyed the freedom to stay up as late as I wanted, my new found “freedom” may have contributed to these panic attacks that I suffered.

Now looking back on it, I would almost find it comical that  I was having trouble keeping one tiny room and bathroom clean as opposed to 15 years later having a whole house to keep clean.  Of course, I have gotten more mature and have gotten a little better with time management, or better at procrastinating and then working my butt off at the last minute to get everything looking good.

Maybe I have learned time management from Longwood, but I learned from Therapeutic Recreation [which was my field of study at Longwood] that nothing is off limits.  When a person sets their mind that they can or want something enough, anything is possible.  We must never put ourselves into categories of CAN and CANNOT, because the only limitations put on ourselves are the self inflicted WILL and WILL NOT.  No matter what is different about that person, no one should be put into a category.  A change of perspective is all that is needed.  It is all about a state of mind.

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On this 80 degree day, what a better place to go that to sit in the AC of STARBUCKS away from all distractions [mainly of cleaning my house] to work on my writing with a good friend.

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It may seem counterproductive, going out with a friend to a coffeehouse to get work done… but the change of scenery actually a bit helpful; working from home, the action takes place on my kitchen table where constant reminders of all there is to do.  My dog stays in the chair overlooking the neighborhood on the main level, where my kitchen is so I can grab some water or coffee, but its also full of distractions.  Distractions of what I should be doing, cleaning and being a good little housewife, instead of working and being productive.  I am thankful to be recognized as working towards the goal of composing a book. I am also thankful for this good friend with whom I’m at the coffeehouse; she also has concentration problems BUT the chatter of Starbucks doesn’t matter to either of us.  My friend and I met at the Fairfax Inova Traumatic Brain Injury Support group, and we both need to get out of our homes in order to work productively.  Or I do at least; having a single room at  Longwood University, you would think it would be easier to work from there, but I would find it easier to pack up all my work and haul it over to the library, avoiding the distractions from my temporary home.  My attention span has definitely strayed since having my Traumatic brain injury.

As I’m writing this, I yet again get off topic and start looking at Twitter, finding an article, 5 Reasons Why You Aren’t Achieving Your Goals

*Totally running into the article not on purpose!*

1. Procrastination

Procrastination. What more can be said? Stalling on personal success can create other challenges making it even more difficult to achieve goals. Instead of postponing your plans, plan on a daily action to get you closer to where you want to be.

2. Distraction

Getting distracted is easy and happens all the time especially when things get tough and we feel like giving up. So how do we best avoid distractions? Always remember what your priorities are and put them at the top of your list each day. Tell yourself that you will complete these certain reasonable tasks before you begin to do anything else.

This post was started on a THURSDAY, in keeping with my THANKFUL THURSDAY posts…but then I got distracted.

But I am most thankful for a good friend to keep me in check by urging me to take my laptop with me anyway, thus giving me no excuse NOT to work; COFFEE BREAKS and the power to stay motivated!  *check out the link to the article, great advice on goal making to stay productive and motivated*

HAVE ANOTHER CUP OF JAVA AND GET STARTED!

starbucks

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Bring your own sunshine

“Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.”
Anthony J. D’Angelo

sunshine

WAYS TO NATURALLY IMPROVE YOUR MOOD

  1. Smile! Smiling is contagious.  If you are in a good mood it helps raise the moods of others.   ex. In the morning at work when everyone is quiet and has not really ‘woken up,’ if you are bubbly and smiley, the effect will cause others to be uplifted, even if they’re laughing at you and your good mood, they’ll have a smile on their face to start out the day.
  2. Fake it if you have to!  It’s nothing to be ashamed of, sometimes you just don’t feel like being ‘up’ and chipper.  Take a deep breath before entering a room and plaster that smile on your face.  Pretending to be in a good mood will transform into a good mood!
  3. Exercise!  Ugh-I know, I said it; listen, it doesn’t have to be anything super hard, a few sun salutations [you yogis know what I mean; a few little up and down motions to warm up your body]  Take your little dog or just yourself (if lacking a four legged friend) on a quick stroll up the street, anything to get the blood flowing!
    wp-1457037399618.jpgExercise produces endorphins, which are the body’s feel good hormones, and after a nice swift walk it is so much easier to face the day!
  4. Get outside! Appreciating nature is a great thing for all of wp-1453859671665.jpgus- even n cold and blustery days, bundling up and admiring the   falling snow [MY FAVORITE], the buds of springtime on the wp-1457040630977.jpgbare branches, full on cherry blossoms, fall leaves of fall…and back to the blizzards that we all love!  Plus, fresh air makes everyone feel better!
  5. Turn on some tunes!  Music is such easy, instantaneous and in my opinion the most effective way to change attitudes.  Research has shown that it has been used to defeat depression, promote relaxation, can patients and help with pain management and many other benefits.  [stress.about.com; Music and your body: how Music Affects Us and Why Music Therapy Promotes Health]  My parents have said that when my favorite music was played to me when I was in a coma, my heart rate would rise and race along when a fast paced song was being played.  Music has serious impacts on mood and stress level.

    Today is THANKFUL THURSDAY, and today I am thankful for MUSIC THERAPY and the easy ways to get happy!

    <big believer in ability for music to enhance moods!>

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Trevor the Otter

“I think what doesn’t kill you makes you a better human being. It opens your eyes, your heart, and your mind. – Derek Hough ”

Peace out
Trevor the Otter

***This cute little otter keeps sending me emails with sometimes very profound quotes.***

OK: By this point in reading on my blog, you should know that I am an extremely lucky girl, who knows what doesn’t kill you makes you a stronger, better person.  Going through such a difficult patch in life allows your eyes to truly be open and appreciative to everything on earth, and gives  more appreciation to be paid towards the things that are unseen.  [To see how lucky I truly am, go to my post, C’est la Vie]

Almost losing your life, would make one thankful for all the capabilities that we have.  I am bright enough and willing to learn to finish high school.  I went to college, and through a strong sense of determination, did not give up and completed school in only five years.  My first year was the hardest; I had been so reliant on my family for doing most of my housekeeping, transportation and basic needs of life, like food.  Here I was, suddenly dropped into a whole new atmosphere, away from the friends that I used to have and acquired since the (big) accident and the help and guidance of my parents.  Without the help of my parents, and I was completely dependent on them after my accident.  It was a positive and healthy change for me, being plopped into a school in FARMVILLE, Virginia (if the name of the town gives any indication of how far away this is from the DC metropolitan area.  Total culture shock.)  In Farmville, 15 years ago, there was the college.  And then there was a Walmart.  Not much else, except for the oriental rug store and the local college restaurant/bar hangout, Macados.  All within walking distance of the campus.  Thinking back to that time in my life brings a smile to my eyes.

Thinking back to that day when my parents first dropped me off at the campus, which seemed like such a huge new “home” away from home, I was in the same position as everybody else.  Sure I was walking with a cane, my speech was a little slower than the norm, but I felt like everyone else was right there with me.    Going away from home to live at Longwood College, was really the best thing that I could have done developmentally.

My eyes were seeing the world through a new set of glasses.  [When I use that expression, I really do mean glasses.  After my car accident, the fourth optic nerve in my left eye was paralyzed; I had double vision and was using a set of glasses lined with prisms to correct my vision and during winter break my freshman year had corrective eye surgery.]  I was an equal, no longer “a girl who used to be cool,” the former cheerleader that got into that accident.  I had a clean state, no one to know the thing to compare

Having graduated with a degree in Therapeutic Recreation, I used my skills and compassion by working in the Activity department of a nursing home for 9 long years.  It didn’t really seem like 9 years, the time really flew by, I was just having such a fun time ‘goofing off’ with the residents.  At the nursing home that I worked at in Fairfax, I worked mostly on the 2nd floor, which is the Special Care Unit.  The residents there were difficult to work with, and require a lot of time and patience.  After a while, I knew what to do, and I felt like everyone else didn’t.  I could deal with difficult residents or difficult coworkers, just not both.  So, I resigned to conquer my next new dream of writing my memoir.  It’s coming, slowly, but if Longwood University has taught me anything, I have learned the  perseverance to see my dreams come true.

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I am  thankful today to have blue fingers.

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My blue fingers are the result of an evening spent with the Girls’ youth group at my church.

My evening was filled spraying ink colors over stencils to make fun designs and markers onto paper luggage tags to clip together (just a fun arts and crafts project) with the chit chat of girls, (middle and high school age) talking about local hangouts like TGI Friday’s (I can still remember going there in high school 20 years ago)
as I smile reminisce about my middle school days
only now the girls are talking about taking Uber to the mall, and Twitter/ Instagram stuff; the social media of the millennials, which I am actually considered a first generation millennial, being born in 1981; only my glory days were the years of the PAGERS, pager

when we would decode pager codes [each # on a phone has 3 letters linked to it; i.e.:  G’nite would be 47383 and I love you would be 143 indicating the number of letters] and the now everyone has cell phones with computers in them, and are tweeting, instagramming and swiping through boys on dating sites [I still remember getting the first computer in my neighborhood when I was in elementary school!] But anyway…

We were talking about everything from prom dresses, broken bones from sledding accidents and ex-boyfriends getting flowers for a girl in the group to Doug Kammererdougkammerer

[NBC4 weatherman who I have tweeted snow updates lately]

Earlier that day my good friend took me out for coffee and then helped me decide which cocktail dress to wear to an alumni event for my college.  Talking to and being around the girls from youth group and the conversation that I had afterwards with the leader who is older than me (meaning she’s wiser and has grown children) are one of the things that I have been thankful for this week.

As my gaze falls upon the keyboard, I notice the blue fingers, and they make me smile to myself.  I am thankful because I have been blessed with the ability to make new friends as I did in youth group and to have so many good friends around me now.  In times of sadness, I know that I can rely on my good friends to keep me lifted up.  Friends to remind me of my worth, my progress in the journey of my life and  my purpose.  I am a writer.  I am thankful for my positive story to tell, much support and comfort to give to others going through tough times like me.  And we can also be thankful for the creation of cell phones and be done with pagers.

 

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Happiness is not what makes us grateful. It is gratefulness that makes us happy.
Br. David Steindl-Rast

Happiness sometimes is walking through Walmart for 3 hours, debating on keychains, yarn, ankle supports, flower pots and yoga DVDs.  And just as we were walking out, after thinking all 6 of our legs were going to fall off, “oh yeah, I wish I were somewhere to buy a printer cartridge…” My friend and her sister circle back into the store leading me to the right place.  Oh, and while we are on our way out of the store, there just happens to be a petite jewelry box exactly the size for which I had been on the lookout ever since last year.  Now, the perfect size is just $10!  That’s exactly how Walmart gets you.

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Shoppers who hated shopping until they met the perfect person [ME!] to go around and run errands.   Happiness is being with good friends all day, and being thankful for finally emerging out of your house from being snowbound for a week.  I loved it, am THANKFUL for friends to get me out and take me to brunch, wander around Walmart aimlessly for a few hours and then come home with me to help walk my dog through the snowy street.  Thanks for being my friend, Lauretta and Guin!!

[This event happened last Thursday, in the aftermath of 2016 Blizzard, I was just too tired to write it after all of that day’s walking]

 

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This blog post is again a THANKFUL THURSDAY post, talking about gratitude, or for what we are THANKFUL

Happiness is not what makes us grateful. It is gratefulness that makes us happy.
Br. David Steindl-Rast

snowflk

Today I am thankful for the anticipation of SNOW.  And so much snow! Snow in the form of BLIZZARD PROPORTIONS!  Although I have been SUPER EXCITED for the snow, and it is finally here, I have also been semi-freaking out for a major hunkering down for this BLIZZARD OF 2016, or  SNOWMAGEDDON #2 [personally, I like SNOWPOCALYPSE OF 2016; THE BLIZZARD JONAH] 

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This storm maybe could- OR maybe not- cause major power outages going on all through the DC Metropolitan area; and then we could be screwed.  IF WE WEREN’T FULLY PREPARED everyone around here WOULD BE A MESS.  However, me and my husband have kept in mind the above forcast, and have been heading out every day since Tuesday… we went to the grocery store to stock up on chips on Tuesday, peanut butter crackers and wine on Wednesday, and today I had to get to Walmart and get bottled and sparkling water.

THE ANTICIPATION OF A BIG SNOW STORM.  That’s what makes me happy this week. Everyone who actually READS my blog, please pause to make a comment: What makes YOU happy on the cold winter days?

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We only have 86400 seconds in the day

Trevor the Otter
“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. – J.R.R. Tolkien ”

Peace out
Trevor the Otter

Live like we’re dying

There is only so much time that we have on this earth, only so much time to spend in on  existence. Learning from the life threatening car accident that I was in half my life ago, I know that life could be gone any moment, and we need to use this time to the fullest extent.

Speaking of that, I started this post on Throwback Thursday so songs from the’90s were emanating from my cell phone, and I heard a Sublime song,

Well, life is (too short), so love the one you got
‘Cause you might get run over or you might get shot.

The lyrics from this song are absolutely true, proving that we need to take full advantage of every moment that we have; every moment that we have to fulfill our purpose and to make a difference in the world.  That is the main reason that I write.  To possibly share my ideas and experiences with others dealing with the same type traumatic injuries or any type of disability or disorder; to provide a positive optimistic outlook even in difficult situations.

As the year has changed to 2016, I have begun reflecting on my life, the purpose and what is currently happening.  Aside from my ambitions to write a great book on overcoming obstacles, this January thus far has not contained much excitement.

What did I do all day?  I’m always busy, but never seem to get anything done.

 

  1. Walked and fed the fur-baby Chazz.
  2. Breakfast and coffee while Bible studying.
  3. Proverbs31 Online Bible Study
  4. Read and answered emails
  5. Started writing a blog post, which was abandoned when another thought comes into my head.
  6. Got on my Kindle and downloaded and looked at Bible devotionals
  7. Book Hoping; from a book on prioritizing and organization, a book that the sermon series at our church will be discussing, a book on overcoming the things that we can’t get past.
  8. And I cleaned house

My structure and organization of my day comes in the written form.  Writing is my current j0b and organizes the structure of my day.  I’m still a social person, a girl that I met last night for coffee said that my former job at the nursing home was super mentally and physically draining.  I needed to stop working there and regroup.  I know I still want to help.  I am helping, though in a non-financial way. through showing my support in Traumatic Brain Injury groups, by using my testimony at church and through helping organize the Prayer Shawl Ministry.  Staying at home I am also helping; I am caring for my Chazz *fur baby, managing and cleaning this house, and trying to get organized, cooking laundry.

A person on the outside looking in on me would say, “Wow- she has a lot of time to get to reading,” or “She should have written 2 books in all of the time it has taken here to think about writing one.”  I am working through the layout of the book in my head, and am trying to get past the basics of *my story* first.  Reading and writing seem like free time activities to me, so naturally they get pushed to the edge of the cliff.
I must be sure to see that my hopes and dreams don’t fall completely off the edge…

 

 

[Images taken from a motivational quote from Trevor the Otter.  trevordeotter@gmail.com]

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Well, with my husband, of course!  But we also LOVE watching
THE BACHELOR!!

flourish-flower

Each season, there is a brand new crop of ladies [or MEN; for the spinoff series, the Bachelorette] vying for the attention of one man, THE BACHELOR.  Major drama ensues between the women get in verbal arguments as to who loves him more, to all out fist fights, as this season shows in the previews for oncoming episodes.

THIS SEASON IS SAID TO BE THE “BEST SEASON EVER” (just like every season is said to be…)  and I can’t wait to watch as the drama unfolds here every Monday evening…

rose ceremonybach20[picture credit to the Huffington Post]

The podcast of 2 Bachelor TV show lovers snarkily giving their opinions of all that happens in THE BACHELOR franchise with Emma Gray and Claire Fallon:        The Bachelor; season20episode1

 

I guess Nick (from Kaitlyn’s season, AND Andi’s season) inspired Becca and Amber to screw up the other girls’  chances with Ben Higgins by showing up during the cocktail party and snatching two of the available roses [at least it wasn’t halfway through he season screwing up other guys’ chances at finding ‘True (or TV) love’

Well, WHATEVER WEDNESDAY, yes, I’m typing this as we re-watch the Bachelor intros…it’s only the third night in a row  (…you pick up new things everytime, right?)   …As the drama continues to unfold, I’ll be here waiting for the romance to follow…

flourish-flower

 

 

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EVOLUTION found in 2015

An article of how to solve the mystery of what we’re meant to do with our lives, finding your purpose tells of the author’s purpose seeming to have evolved from her many different experiences that she has encountered in her life.

As she has found her different experiences to have molded her purpose into finding her ‘true purpose,’ I can now see that my feeling of  searching for a ‘higher true purpose’, is not that uncommon.

I am thankful for all that has happened in my life, although mostly in retrospect, because all of my experiences have formed and are still forming ME, whichever path God plans to set before me, and it must be left up to that higher entity, if it’s meant to be….
I am thankful for all the mistakes, that have led me up to this point in life, because every step, be it false or good-intended, have brought me to the place where I am currently.  I must remember the mistakes have been in the past, and the future is wide open.

purpose

 

As you seek and live out your purpose, don’t be afraid to let it evolve if it wants to, even if you were sure you had already discovered and embarked on what you were destined to be in this life.
– Susan Biaili M.D.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/prescriptions-life/201211/6-keys-finding-your-purpose
Picture: Harrisonhomes.org

 

2016 GOALS

2016

GET HEALTHY!  -ER…
[MAINTAIN HIGH ENERGY]

  • getting to sleep EARLIER
  • drink more sparkling water
  • watch foods that eat
  • MAKE TIME FOR FITNESS!
    • yoga, even 10 minutes a day

BE MORE PRODUCTIVE/GET MORE ACCOMPLISHED!

  • get into a schedule!
    • plan ahead -TODO lists
  • GET INTO A REGULAR WRITING/BLOGGING SCHEDULE!
  • AM [DURING BREAKFAST] FIRST 5 Bible study

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HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE OUT THERE–
[YES, EVEN THE NEIGHBORS THAT ARE FREAKING OUT MY POOR LITTLE RESCUE DOG  WITH THE SOUND OF FIREWORKS]

 

 

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