Inside Danielle's mind

Yes, It’s back!! Another Thankful Thursday post…and today I am thankful for indecisiveness!

THANKFUL FOR INDECISIVENESS?!? Yes, that problem with making decisions…I find when my calendar is full, and I can’t decide what my planner should look like- it’s a good thing-not bad. It just means that I need to actually learn to make an EXECUTIVE DECISION and decide what is more important to me as ~~a woman~~, as myself I guess. Tonight I have the option of canceling my plans and going to a girls youth small group at my church (which I already switched days of the week for my ladies coffee night to accommodate girls group) or keeping with my plans to meet girls my same age for coffee (and to crochet to relax)

Just like Caila kept changing her mind in Bachelor In Paradise…

One one hand, I would really like to be a good example for the younger girls who are struggling through teenager-dom, but I (like Caila) need to look towards what I really want. I can’t make up my mind about anything- but I am fortunate enough to have a very patient husband, who calls me back to see that I’m ok after seeing all of my missed phone calls.

He talks me through the situation. Breaks it down, “Which do you want to go to?” , “Do you really need to be there?”; “Which one seems like it would be the most relaxing?”

https://www.yahoo.com/tv/bachelor-paradise-preview-caila-brett-000000990.html

on the flip side…you can be THANKFUL to actually have so many options!

Just like Caila went back and forth and couldn’t decide between Brett or Jared, when Jared is OBVIOUSLY the one she likes more… CAILA IS A PEOPLE PLEASER!

A people pleaser who constantly changes her mind…just wants to keep everyone happy. The people pleaser is one of the nicest people you know a type of friend that you can rely on for everything; they try to be the mosst helpful, they cannot say ‘no.’ According to Psychology Today website. The good psychologists say that people pleasers get all of their work done, try to help everyone else do their work, and then try to plan everything. This is a unhealthy habit that can get a person very stressed out, and then burnt out. This is how I feel from time to time, so then I quit at the nursing home, and now in life, I take it all in stride. I try to do what I can do, observe from the sidelines, while being a cheerleader!

cheerleader with yellow pom pom clipart

With me, a traumatic brain injury survivor, I already have the problem of making up my mind, and then I want to make things easier for everyone I care about. I don’t want to inconvenience anyone, so I would just say ‘I don’t know,’ and go with whatever someone else wishes. Some problems with cognition that survivors experience have to do with planning– I must have a million day-planners-problems with memory– remembering to write the dates in each individual one-organization– My workplace is full of sticky notes with to do lists everywhere-attention, it is very hard to keep me on task; I need lists to concentrate and go back to and figure out what I am currently doing

How does TBI affect cognition and what can be done about it?

After a TBI it is common for people to have problems with attention, concentration, speech and language, learning and memory, reasoning, planning and problem-solving.

[The above information was taken from a website trying to educate on traumatic brain injury]

but sometimes its good to have too many options of what social excursion to go on the evening, and at least it’s an easy, non life threatening decision. Should I really go out on this date or not….

desk calendar september 2016 clipart

Posted on August 25, 2016 by Danielle! | Leave a comment

The hardest thing for me to do is to communicate over text message. Sure, it’s easy and convenient, but it is also so hard to interpret. Tone of voice is missing, and joking around can be viewed as insulting or blase. Key and Peele demonstrate Text message confusion

Especially with a brain injury, texts can get misconstrued, leaving you to be like, “So that’s how they really feel,” I know that I personally feel insulted but perhaps I’m just a little too sensitive, and I over- analyze EVERYTHING. I myself am guilty of starting out a light, fun non-committal conversation over text and then go back, re-read that same conversation and realize that it may have been taken the wrong way. Then trying to call and explain a certain situation, that person has already gotten offended, in a bad mood and just not wanting to discuss the particular topic. The caller is then put through to voicemail. I have even ASKED people not to text with me, but I still strike up text conversations anyway.

In reading an article about Miscommunication, it often makes conversation seem insincere. Women have the most difficult time in relationships through text, another article states. When we use texting to apologize/wok out differences or to make decisions, it effects the relationship adversely. PICK UP THE PHONE! Or better yet, talk in person! Most decisions are not something to be taken lightly, and via text message many details are left out, plus the added exclusion of intonation and tone of voice. A psychology website even states that the words in a text message could take on a different meaning due to the feelings that you could already have of the relationship.

Some of my friends won’t even pick up the phone when I call, they only prefer to converse through text message. Especially my friends from high school will mostly talk through text (the few that are still in contact with me- which would be like 2 or 3). One high school friend, my closest high school friend, even announced through text that she eloped and got married! Took the wedding picture with her cell phone~ I mean, how much more MILLENNIAL can some people get?

Texting is almost an addiction. It’s just so much easier/more convenient/time efficient to type out a little note than to make the effort to actually call and TALK to another person. Part of the problem of our generation but more so a problem of the generations yet to come. Now a days, you can communicate from the comfort of behind a screen, through email, instant message, texting whatever and thus are raising the younger adults WITHOUT ANY social skills whatsoever. It’s Facebook this, Twitter that, and it SERIOUSLY IS AN ADDICTION!

According to multiple online articles I have read, the millennial generation has been defined as coming of age around the turn of the century, or being born before then. Being born in 1981, I am supposedly a first generation millennial according to most studies; I was 19 years old as the year 2000 came about.

Does anyone even remember 20 years ago, before everyone was constantly available to talk to, contact by email, or through text?

My house grew up with a landline phone and a typewriter. It wasn’t until I was at least in third grade that we got one of the first types of computer, and we were the first family on r street to get one. In high school, we didn’t have cell phones, we had pagers which meant that one person would leave a number and the owner of the pager would need to a) find a landline and b) call the other person’s landline to talk. We had pager codes to tell everyone apart (mine was 55, meaning Kelly Kapowski since I was a cheerleader). We would use the letters connected to the number pad on the phones to send these cryptic text messages. If we weren’t home in high school when someone called, we weren’t home. Now with the influx of technology, that has wiped everything away- you are always available. Back then (now I sound old) it was easy to separate work life and home life but not so much anymore. Let’s say you just didn’t want to be bothered; your mom calls on your cell and you don’t feel like talking to her. Then she would call my regular home phone, and I’d have to picj up or else my little Chazz dog would start howling.

Posted on August 21, 2016 by Danielle! | Leave a comment

4TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALL GAME

Picture a Saturday night, some Longwood alumni friends all getting together (and caught in the rain!) over beer, greasy food and baseball. Sounds perfect, right?

We all met up in DC to see a Nationals baseball game. Before the game, we had to get a little pre-game socializing in; the Longwood alumni met at the Fairgrounds right next to the stadium. I had planned to meet up with some friends that graduated in my major, THERAPEUTIC RECREATION and ran into a guy who graduated in my class that remembered me from 11 years ago. I also saw staff member who remembered me; I always saw Bill Fiege hanging around Lancer gym, where most of the classes required for my major were held, as he was an athletic director from 2002-’03, and alumni director from’99-02. He is also a graduate of the great school LONGWOOD December 1994.

Standing in line to get into the game, a random friend from Hampden Sydney College was there with his family (a total coincidence, but who attended InterVarsity meetings while at Longwood with me on a weekly basis). I also met new alumni that I hadn’t come across before, a girl that had graduated in my husband’s class, Dec ’99- walking spring of 2000. (My husband always corrects me when I say he graduated in 2000)

Why go to a Longwood alumni event? It’s really great connecting with other people that you went to school with, meeting different ages all one thing in common, a love for Longwood. I met many graduates at the social at the bullpen at Nationals Park. There are so many people from Longwood of all different ages at the alumni gatherings. There were a lot of younger graduates, many graduates of all ages actually. I met a woman that attended Longwood when it was an all female teaching school, but many more alumni that had just graduated, and I was actually surprised to see students that had graduated when I attended. You can go to the alumni events and mix with other ages to talk to and compare notes, about the present state of the campus, share stories of monumental events that happened to change the school (The Longwood fire particularly comes to mind). To connect with not only alumni that you know, but to meet new people and form new connections, all because there is one thing you have in common, a love for this school.

3mattcoffee

I met my husband through the connection of both being Longwood alums; we met years after we had both graduated and found each other on MySpace (back when it was still cool). Matt was searching for alumni and saw that we had also gone to the same high school, West Springfield High School. He noticed my love for coffee, and our mutual love for Longwood. We went to a coffee shop, and the rest is history…

FOR IT’S 1, 2, 3 STRIKES, YOU’RE OUT, AT THE OLD BALL GAME!

STRIKE 1: METRO; awful experience, first we drove to the Springfield/Franconia station, and the track was down between where we needed to get to the Nats station. We needed to drive to the Pentagon City metro station- which was fine. The iffy part happened when we had to switch trains, there were so many people! Getting home was the worst, the metro trains were packed full of people, and we had to transfer trains by going up a staircase, and around to the next train. This definitely confused me, a young 35 year old girl with a traumatic brain injury, everybody around me was frantic (and quickly!) walking around me, luckily I had Matt Karst to think fast and show me where to go.

STRIKE 2: RAIN; although the Longwood University Alumni were the few in the Fairgrounds under the shelter of a outdoor roof.

NO STRIKE 3; WASHINGTON NATIONALS WON THE GAME!

The whole social aspect of the day was pretty fulfilling, it all happened with good friends one summer night at a Nationals game. And it was a Longwood Alumni event, you can’t go wrong!

Posted on August 8, 2016 by Danielle! | Leave a comment

otter

“I think what doesn’t kill you makes you a better human being. It opens your eyes, your heart, and your mind.” – Derek Hough [Dancing with the Stars]

Peace out
Trevor the Otter

***This cute little otter keeps sending me emails with sometimes very profound quotes.***

AND IN THE BEGINNING… Keep on keepin’ on

I finally took that deep long leap into unknown, uncharted waters and went to college AWAY FROM HOME. Far far away; FARMVILLE, Virginia (if the name of the town gives any indication of how far away this is from the DC metropolitan area. Total culture shock) is about 3 hours away from my home in northern VA. Here I was, suddenly dropped into a whole new atmosphere, away from the friends that I used to have and acquired since my life changing car accident. Without the help of my parents, who I was completely dependent on after my accident, I went to college. It was a positive and healthy change for me, being plopped into a school in the middle of nowhere. In Farmville, 15 years ago, there was the college. And then there was a Walmart. Not much else, except for the Oriental rug store and the local college restaurant/bar hangout, Macados. All within walking distance of the campus. Thinking back to that time in my life brings a smile to my eyes.

I was glad to get away from home, and to venture out on my own, although it was very lonely. It didn’t help that my roommate and I did not exactly get along, and for that reason I didn’t spend very much time in my room that semester. I would go to the library, or to my friends’ room in another building to study and socialize there. The library, ah the library; it was my favorite place to study. The library was free from distractions, at least the distractions of having another person just sitting next to you studying, watching TV and laughing, or there with her boyfriend that seemed was constantly visiting from her hometown. The fact that it was my first time living without my parents, just 2 1/2 years post traumatic brain injury (TBI), was amazing. I had become so reliant on my parents helping with the basic needs of life, like food, cleaning the house and laundry.

Plus I was trying to establish some sort of social life of my own, get involved in activities and clubs. I chose InterVarsity, a Christian club with really good people, TRO (Therapeutic Recreation Organization, my major’s fraternity) and went to a bunch of activities on campus by myself so I’d meet people. My experience from meeting people at Longwood College helped me throughout my life while coming into new situations. Meeting all these new people my freshman year built my self confidence to go out in the REAL WORLD after graduation and work with people in all different walks of life. In my field of study, this is incredibly important since I work with people all day.

Thinking back to that day when my parents first dropped me off at the campus, which seemed like such a huge new “home” away from home, I was in the same position as everybody else.

: Clowning around, Oktoberfest 2001 w/ MaryKate Harris

Sure I was walking with a cane, my speech was a little slower than the norm, but I felt like everyone else was right there with me. Going away from home to live at Longwood College, was really the best thing that I could have done developmentally. I was an equal, no longer “a girl who used to be cool,” the former cheerleader that got into that accident. I had a clean state, with no one to compare me. That’s what I liked most about going far away from home. It gave me the chance to find my independence, to grow up and define the person who is Danielle Houston. Oh yeah, and I got an education to do what I want with my life.

But I did it! I went to college, and through a strong sense of determination did not give up and completed school in five years. I survived Longwood with the help of the Academic Support Center and my professors; who knew a professor was willing to spend every day in his office hours helping me grasp Statistics at 8AM in the morning! I loved my Statistics professor; he had so much patience with me, helping me to correct the mistakes that I had made and how to correctly solve the math problems. I had tried so hard on the final exam, attempting each problem, but somehow just not coming up with the correct answer. However, he knew that I was trying and I passed the class and fulfilled the math requirement for my major! The Academic Support Center provided carbon copy notepaper for a classmate to take notes on (she got a copy of her notes and so did I), which was very helpful, because I tend to zone out very often. The Academic Support center also made the adaptations to allow me with extra time to take tests in a less stimulating environment. The director of the of the Academic Support center, Rebecca Sturgill helped me so much not to quit and give up; the staff found solutions and guidance with what was troubling me. This helped me throughout my career at the nursing home to look at adaptive techniques to help our residents, like enlarging puzzles or coloring pictures and allowing extra time for various activities.

In order to graduate with that degree in Therapeutic Recreation, I needed to begin a summer internship, where I was put in a different environment doing something new and exciting, but very unfamiliar to me. My junior internship over the summer was with a former Longwood graduate, Barbie Burton as a supervisor, but it was in the real world in a new environment. I was nervous working with a different population than I had worked with previously. The population that I was working with was adults with intellectual disabilities or the adults in the MR population. Bingo and arts and crafts were my favorite programs to conduct. In my senior internship, I trained at a nursing home and the assisted living facility at Greensprings Retirement Community. From the very beginning this was a different environment for me, we had to dress up each day and act professional; Greensprings is a very nice, dignified community. I especially liked going on van trips with the red hat society (ladies over 50) redhat and the purple hat ladies (over 70). A ceramics class that we were participating in with the residents helped me to see the joy that the residents derived from arts and crafts activities.

Having graduated with a degree in Therapeutic Recreation with the help of Dr. S. Lynch (the director of TR), I used my skills and compassion by working in the Activity department of a nursing home for 9 long years. It didn’t really seem like 9 years, the time really flew by; I was just having such a fun time ‘goofing off’ with the residents. At the nursing home that I worked at in Fairfax, I worked mostly on the 2nd floor, which is the Special Care Unit. The residents there were difficult to work with, and require a lot of time and patience, although I loved interacting with them and their family members creating the memorable, happy times. Just today I actually got a Facebook message from a family member, “Miss you. You were among the best at the nursing home. Your love and compassion was very evident.”

I started out working at Fairfax Nursing Center and was assigned the afternoon to evening shift. Night time at the nursing home is always difficult to experience. In the afternoon, the residents go into a “sundowning,” which means that they get very agitated in the afternoon/early evening. ‘Dancing with the Stars’ TV reality show would immediately calm the residents down. DWTS bears a close relationship to American Bandstand, and the other dancing shows that were aired in the past that the residents remember.

I had been working there for a long time and needed a change. My current plan is to conquer my next dream of writing my memoir. I try to implement the skills that I have developed in previous English courses. I also use my expressive writing skills that we were given a chance to practice by turning in Dr. Koesler’s weekly writing assignment. My memoir is coming, slowly, but if Longwood University has taught me anything, I have learned the perseverance to see my dreams come true.

Posted on July 11, 2016 by Danielle! | 1 Comment

I should have known. This encounter makes me feel like I’m a bad owner. Chazz nipped at a little girl yesterday. It broke her skin slightly. I think the little girl was more scared than anything; once her Mom was holding her, she stopped crying and acted fine. Chazz seemed like he was a lot of people around him (I admit, there were a bunch of people outside talking, 3 families plus a bunch of kids running around). He seemed fine with the kids, letting them pet him, he was even laying down when my careful neighbor kid came to pet him again, but I guess she must have made a sudden move and this scared Chazz. We went to the veterinarian this morning (just for a routine check up), and she told us about reading a dog’s body language. She also told us that Chazz was probably just tolerating the interactions with the kids, but not really liking the petting and extra attention.

It’s my fault [as the owner], I should have known better, that Chazz was getting overstimulated with all the people around. The vet told us not to let Chazz around other young kids anymore, and showed us a video on when dogs don’t want to be petted. Don’t worry kids, Chazz won’t stay to hang out around anymore; when we walk by and see everyone, we’ll say ‘hi’ in passing and I’ll leave Chazz at home before socializing. I am so sorry Bri and Winter, and Mom, I know its my fault and I shouldn’t have let him hang out. As with everything else, we can only learn from our mistakes and take precautionary methods in the future.

Posted on June 10, 2016 by Danielle! | 2 Comments

Every Tuesday morning, there is a MOMS group at my church. MESSIAH UNITED METHODIST CHURCH One wouldn’t think that I would like this group, not having children myself. But this MOMS group is comprised of women my age, or a bit older….more like GRANDmoms. (By the way, I have just started attending due to the acceptance of ALL women, not just those with children. MOMS now stands for Mothers and Others in Mission and Study) Sure, there are infants breast feeding in the room, VZM.IMG_20150912_114534 and the occasional little kiddo running around (just at the beginning- the toddlers and small children go to daycare next door), but I’m pretty used to it. After all, being with a little Elena for about a month and a half in total (when they were visiting from Bulgaria and when they were transitioning back to the US). Elena is my good friend’s little girl; the best thing is-THEY JUST MOVED DOWN THE STREET!

CHAZZFALL

My fur baby and I are always walking to or by their house. Chazz is another way I can relate! Just because he’s a dog, doesn’t mean I love him any less. But I always end up talking about Elena. I would go over and babysit her, play with her in her backyard and make soup for her sick momma or Pinks (her stuffed animal) who got sick. That’s basically all she knows; it is a very rare occurrence to see her well, or anyone in their family well actually. Daycares all over are a petri dish of germs and once the illness is in the house, everyone gets sick!

It feels good to be involved with a Bible study with my peers; Or mostly my peers, there are like 4 or 5 girls that are all like 35! (including myself). And I really like the book that we are currently studying. It is very thought provoking and makes me feel very smart; like I earned a college degree for a reason, and am now putting it to use. Sure, you learn good skills to work with other people in college, [Longwood University, which has the most succinct therapeutic recreation program in the state of Virginia; skills like interacting with others’ people that have disabilities] but I haven’t really put any of my academic/critical thinking skills to use in a while. Working at the nursing home one has to prepare the trivia, for instance at a fifth grade level, or even younger, something that residents with dementia can understand. I would look up crafts for children on Pinterest, but I suppose unless you’re involved in a book club or writing about adult topics that require research, most people do not do much with critical thinking.

Back to the book we are reading, Making Sense of the Bible: Rediscovering the Power of Scripture Today by Adam Hamilton. This book brings different views into the light, things I have thought about previously, but have never quite understood. He delves into the science behind creation and the depiction of Adam and Eve in the Bible. The author tries to make sense of all the violence in the Old Testament without justifying it. In later chapters of the book, Hamilton is often questioning if we can trust Gospel accounts of Jesus [ch 24], touches on the topics of women’s roles, tattoos and homosexuality and giving in his opinion a way proving the truths of the Bible.

I am also participating in a study conducted in the middle of the day on Thursdays. Needless to say, I am the youngest person there [those with time in the middle of the day during a workweek are mostly retired], being with a variety of people also teaches me a lot. And in each of the studies I also learn about other denominations of the Christian faith; in the adult group one women was talking about a different study in which she participates with people who are in the Baptist belief, and we have discussed the differences in the opinions that these faiths hold as truth. In this adult study, we also have mentioned the comparison of the Hindu faith, as well are currently reading a book whose author is a Christian who does not actively pursue formal church services (we assume).

On Wednesday nights there is a girls youth small group that I have been helping out with recently. We are currently examining and talking about ‘obsessions’ that we hold. Like my ‘obsession’ is with coffee (as my Pinterest board clearly displays), or our similar ‘obsession’ with boys, like Doug Kammerer [NBC weatherman] . I feel like I can more closely relate to the girls’ group of high school/middle schoolers; I have more of the same issues as them, but having already experienced the struggles that we all go through in high school, am able to share some of the accounts that have worked for me.

Although, I am not in the exact same “walks of life” as the people in these groups, I find myself being able to relate with them in some fashion, and it feels great to be included. This is what I am THANKFUL for this week, being ‘part’ of something, a group or a few groups. Feeling I fit in and can contribute and participate in the discussions in some way. Isn’t that what we all want? After being so isolated and alone all of the time before, (or feeling so alone, I was actually surrounded by people) my times after my accident in high school- and post college just going to work and coming home each week. I may be alone in my specific travels of life [like we all are, we each have our own goals of what we want to accomplish], but I finally do not feel so alone. And I am so very THANKFUL for that.

grateful-in-scrabble-tiles

Posted on May 12, 2016 by Danielle! | 1 Comment

We all have an artistic side waiting to be articulated, and art is a vehicle we can use to heal ourselves and one another.
[http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-24682/4-ways-to-use-art-to-overcome-anxiety.html ]

ART CAN PRODUCE ITSELF IN MANY FORMS. The concluding result is always the same: total relaxation.
When you’ve had a stressful day, what do you first think about to help you unwind? I touched on music before-as a medium for complete relaxation- it just has a magical ability to turn that frown upside down! or completely change your mood. It’s amazing how quickly that medium of practice works!

Gathering ideas from the American Art Therapy Association Coloring in Adult coloring books is not true art therapy, “The American Art Therapy Association supports the use of coloring books for pleasure and self-care, however these uses should not be confused with the delivery of professional art therapy services, during which a client engages with a credentialed art therapist.”

I engage in coloring. I have a coloring agenda book. Coloring does make me feel relaxed, distracts me from my current stressful thoughts and I am proud of the pretty pictures produced, but it is not the same thing as producing something that is an abstract form of personal creation.

I was never certified in art therapy, I just always organized the arts and crafts program at the nursing home that I was working in. I also came up with ideas for my internships and practiced arts and crafts in my education at LONGWOOD UNIVERSITY for the classes that we visited in Farmville Elementary school to work with the children as well as the nursing home in Farmville. As well as through my education, I have found through my internships at the Training Center, working with adults with mental imparments, and the nursing home and assisted living facility, that the satisfaction produced by simply creating a picture or an art project by the residents’ is personally gratifying.

At the nursing home that I have worked, I helped the residen turkeycraft ts to go outside and gather leaves in the fall to paste them on construction paper, color an outdoor scene or designs by the leaves.

Around Halloween, we could wrap a tissue around a cotton ball to make a ghost. We would also make stained glass windows with tissue paper color papers. For relaxation we would color or draw with crayons and colored pencils; we had a man at the nursing home who was a military pilot and loved drawing pictures of war fighter planes.

Seeing bright colors and looking at art can just be inspiring. In any confined inpatient setting that I have been in, the walls are covered with bright and colorful pictures as opposed to boring white walls. Besides making the facility cheery and more home-like, the colors even give family members and staff something to feel energized and smile.

Whether it is the satisfaction of completing something tangible with your own hands, tracing and coloring in pictures in a coloring book or looking at the bright cheery pictures on the wall, art is therapeutic for everyone.

colors

Art is about relaxation, being creative and feeling productive. We can all be THANKFUL for the therapeutic value that the creation of art holds. Plus, it’s always something fun to look at pretty colors.

Posted on May 5, 2016 by Danielle! | 1 Comment

Who else could I be more thankful for than the one four-legged best friend who is always with me?

I am today, and always, thankful for Chazz Karst

An ode to my doggie

He gives me a reason for waking up in the morning.
Dog ownership IS a big deal, and it’s also a BIG RESPONSIBILITY, but the rewards far outweigh the cost of caring.
My cute little Chazz dog is an extended therapeutic device.
Not only does he do the cutest little stretches, but when he jumps up on the couch and curls up close, a great feeling of love is emitted from just rubbing his back.
Dogs always seem to sense others’ emotions.
When extremely sad, my dog seems to ‘know’ and always gets close to comfort.
He is my reason for getting up in the morning. Literally. Just knowing that you have the responsibility to care for another, who can’t communicate verbally.What do you have todo first thing in the morning? Visit the bathroom. But for Chazz, it would be first devouring breakfast- then a potty break.
Chazz keeps me active– helps get the blood pumping by walking the neighborhood, plus play time![Let me warn you; this dog is very friendly with humans, but he devours squeak toys like nothing I have ever seen. I give each toy a lifespan of 5 minutes]
Gets me to appreciate nature! When you are walking outside, it is nearly impossible to ignore the beauty of the seasons, most of the time captured by camera.
He’s a social being!
As soon as we adopted this cute little ball of (not really existent) fur, we meet all of the neighbors simply by passing them on the street.

Chazz is always around for me, Most dogs provide loving companionship, and it can be comforting simply knowing that he’s there, he cares, and will [hopefully] never leave you…AS LONG AS YOU KEEP THE COOKIES COMING…

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Posted on April 21, 2016 by Danielle! | 3 Comments

During my second year of taking classes at LONGWOOD UNIVERSITY, majoring in TR (Therapeutic Recreation) everyone in the field of study took a class that we just called Phys Dis, the name of the course is actually ‘Recreation with people with Physical Disabilities.’ Our instructor, Dr. Lynch, assigned everyone to go around campus for the entire day using a wheelchair. Not only navigating around the dining hall, the library, up and down the elevators in the dorm buildings, but to also see the difficulties of being in a wheelchair (our campus was very much ADA compliant, and it isn’t too difficult to get around). There is an accessibility ramp bypassing the stairs that went up into our physical education building, where most TR majors’ classes are held, and another ramp going into the dining hall. Ramps were accessible basically everywhere there were stairs. The ramps were there to be used, and though I had used them a few times when I was super tired from trekking from one side of the campus to the other, most of the times chose to forgo the hikes up the steps just to appear ‘capable to do it.’ There was nothing else that I wanted to do than to ‘blend in’ and be like everybody else.

[I hated being photographed with my cane in college, but you can see in the left corner, my collecction of different colored canes-gotta match the outfit, right?]

When Dr. Lynch gave out the assignment t0 use a wheelchair everywhere around campus, ‘EXCEPT FOR DANIELLE,’ I had an attitude of what, you don’t think that I don’t need to do this? Why? [The whole point of therapeutic recreation is inclusion; that anyone can do this if we only adapt it in some way] Why everyone else, I ask Dr. Lynch…she replies to me that I could, if I really want to. But upon thinking about it, I have a hard enough time getting around already, walking with a cane. This exercise is to show the students how difficult it is for those with physical disabilities to get around, but also show the students how they are perceived by the rest of the school.

During my time at Longwood, I was given all possible accommodations, from reserving my room as a single room when my roommate moved out after the first semester to being assigned a dining hall student worker to carry my tray of food to a table. Of course, I did this once, it just left me to sit by myself in the dining hall which I found was depressing enough and made me feel different. Maybe it’s my hypersensitivity paranoia, but I thought that the other students all had looks of pity on their faces as they saw me sitting alone at a table.

In academic accommodations, I had access to a quiet place to take tests free from the distractions of being in the classroom with all of the other students. I received the notes of another student to supplement my own notes, written on carbon copy paper. We tried tape recording the classes, but in college it’s hard enough to stay awake during a class and there is not an extra two hours in the day that you would like to sit through it again. Plus my attention span made everything extremely difficult. Longwood did try to give me every advantage possible, and we tried out all the ideas that technology could provide: the voice recognition computer programs wouldn’t recognize my voice, it was too quiet/squeaky, or something. It’s not like I needed it, if anything taught me patience it is the traumatic brain injury and my pride that was reluctant to say that I needed help.

[I wasn’t different than anyone else, so I shyed away from being photographed with a cane, but I couldn’t help it this time]
a little background info: this picture was taken during LONGWOOD COLLEGE’s Oktoberfest, and I got the great honor of being a clown, a person has to be nominated to the spirit board by other professors and students]

I wanted to be treated and perceived as an equal among students, just not that much of an equal to endure an entire day in a wheelchair. I figure that I’ve already had my share of weird looks, plus the enjoyment of the obstacles of getting around with a physical disability. I think my classmates should at least try some of the difficulties, if even for just a day.

Posted on March 22, 2016 by Danielle! | Leave a comment

What am I thankful for? What am I not thankful for?

As my husband and I say our prayers at night, we are always thankful that we have found each other, and our little doggie Chazz.

Another round of thanks has to go out to owning a nice comfortable home with great neighbors (except when they have block parties and shoot off fireworks, scaring our little Chazz). Especially during the cold winter months are we lucky to have a nice warm place to stay.

We are thankful that we have a loving and supportive close family ♥ who all live in the area. We are very thankful for Matt’s great job and my work around the house, writing, and volunteering.

I am thankful for living my dream life, having a wonderful place to go and being around my wonderful family and friends.

Posted on March 17, 2016 by Danielle! | 1 Comment